To be bold is not the same as bragging.
I am bold – or try to be – to keep my confidence from failing. Just like an athlete talks about her chances to win.
Bragging is something else. At least in my world. Bragging is to remind my reader every entry about my third place award, preferably in terms like I had won an Oscar. And I am pretty sure of I don’t do that.
Of course I have confidence that fails me from time to time. Of course I have moments when I ask myself if I’m a fool spending my energy on writing movie scripts. Or writing at all for that matter.
Then I remind myself what I love with script writing, the reason why I keep trying and trying. It’s the sublime and delicate balance of words: The powerful shortness of an action line; the attitude in a honed dialog. The quest for the everlasting, perfect word.
A movie script is like a one-hundred and ten pages long haiku poem where every word is weighted and angled and considered.
I can’t say I am a master of these quests. The point of the fun is for it to be a quest. If I someday, by some dreadful reason, would consider me a master with nothing more to learn, I would quit.
What I dare say is that I can write a movie script fitting the needs of the commissioner (if I like the story). I dare say that I can do this pretty well too.
Does this make me appear like a bragging master? Gee, I hope not. If I were a musician should I not claim I could play?
Someday I’ll have a project that fails me too, even if I started with the best intentions. Just because I’ve been lucky so far does not mean I think the world is roses and I got angel wings. I’m just one of those who happen to love script writing, and want to do it for the rest of my life, and take the rough with the smooth.